Two tickets to the gun show.

Most of you that know me, know that when i ain't pumping iron, i'm blowing shit up like the late, great Hannibal Smith. I am, and always have been the number one gangster in Redbridge, so it won't come as a big surprise for you to hear that when given the chance to go to a gun range and shoot an AK47 i jumped at it.

It turns out that in America, pretty much anyone can buy themselves an arsenal or two if they so wish. I realised that fact all too well while talking to Rob and his Air Force mates.

I had a quite sobering run-through of Josh's arsenal, which includes: 1 x 22mm sport pistol, 2 x 9mm hand guns, 1 x 9mm magnum, 1 x magnum that shoots shotgun cartridges called (i shit you not) 'The Judge!', 1 x long range rifle and last, but certainly not least, the AK-47 or Kalashnikov to our Russian friends. Boy o boy was I gonna have fun!

Heart pumping, bladder failing; we get to the range and I start shooting. The guns go from sissy to Schwarzenegger, and each go starts the same; me nervously gripping the gun in a sweaty hand, loading it with another sweaty, shaking hand, aiming for the face and squeezing the trigger. BOOM! And the booms got louder every time.

I´ll be honest, I was a pretty good aim and the target (smurfs as they are called on account of them being blue) generally had no face or heart left. Hey, they shouldn´t have been there in the first place! 'The Judge' was probably the most fun. It has a kick like a mule, flames shoot out of the end of the barrel and I felt like Danny Glover in 'Leathal Weapon', which feels very cool. He had a couple of hours off from his retirement that day and kicked some Smurf butt!

For those of you wondering about the AK, it´s quite light-weight, with a very soft trigger and gives a fair kick. Unfortunately, it´s a no no to spray automatic weapons in the gun range, so i took it easy and shot the Smurf´s nose in slowly.

I have to give a massive shout out to the boys of the US Air Force and Wednesday night 80´s horror movie club. To Rob, Alex and of course to Josh for his big guns. Cheers lads. WOOHA!